She turns Eight

No, you do not need to have a birthday, I told her.  No need to turn another year older.  Seven was a fine age to stay full of butterflies, jump ropes, dolls, and cartwheels… 

But once again she did not listen to her mom, and skipped away to celebrate her birthday and taking a little piece of my heart with her. 

Has it really been eight years already? 

Skye

There was once a little border collie, unloved, abused and without a family.

A boy and a girl rescued her, and brought her home.

They give her name, Skye, like the beauty above her.

She loves to catch Frisbees and take long walks.

She loves to chase and play with her fur family Boomer and later Stormy.

She despises squirrels in her yard.

She dislikes loud noises, bright lights and garbage trucks.

She does not care for others, because she loves the boy and the girl, the most.

The years past and there are more to love, two little boys and a little girl.

The years slow and she no longer can catch the Frisbees or chase the squirrels.

Fourteen years have passed to fast.  The boy and girl are sad.

She looks at the girl and the boy one last time, and then she goes to sleep.

She sees a beautiful bridge, and then Boomer.  She can run fast again.  She is free.

Fire Engines

Don't blink.


You are not seeing things

Because yes, mom that is a young, handsome, man. It felt like it came overnight. One day, I looked at him and the traces of childhood were escaping fast.
Gone are the days of big wheels, fire engines, choo-choo trains, and tonka trucks. All set aside collecting dust and slowly losing memories. A thing to be sold or held for a grand child or two. A thing to advoid as it represents "baby" toys.

So, when a big fire engine pulled into the cul-de-sac for a birthday party across the street, Vitaly did not want to 'see' it. That is for babies mom (as all of the adult males o00hhed and aaahhed). But, when no one was looking, I managed to capture this:

If you  look closely, I think you can still see a glimmer in his eyes and a smile of a little boy once fascinated with fire engines.

No he didn't!

Vitaly talking on his dad's cell phone to his "girlfriend". 
Dad- hang up time for your bath.
Vitaly- talking into the phone- "I can't right NOW!"
Dad- repeat
Vitaly- repeat
Dad getting irritated says NOW!
Vitaly then says.......(wait)......."I Love you too!"

((Pause))

Then giggling from dad, falling on the floor laughing from Nikolai, and me in complete and utter speechlessness.  No, he didn't just say THAT! 

But, he did.

Tweens

No one ever said the pre-teen years would be easy.  I have heard all of the horror stories from my friends/family that remind me (drum roll)… JUST WAIT UNTIL THE TEENS!

Well, the same friends/family never had a son with severe special needs like RAD, PTSD, Autism Spectrum, PPD and all sorts of crazy lettered diagnoses.

Yep, the “tween” years have been completely crazy!   But, add in the above SN and it is a whole new experience!  Puberty has caused my 12 year old to grow into a very tall child (in the 95%) with huge hands and size 13 shoe feet!  Include in that all of the bodily changes and then picture the following:

-          No eye contact

-          Wants to be “left alone”

-          Music rules his ears

-          No, I don’t want to, and What is the majority of his vocabulary

-          Hugs or kisses (NO WAY)

-          I am not wearing that!

-          Disgraceful looks at his sister and brother

And, now add in… tween Girls!

Vitaly has discovered the joys of a giggling, text messaging, phone calling, and note- writing girlfriend.   Unfortunately, for her Vitaly did lose his cell phone (due to inappropriate downloads from the internet that tween boys find appealing). 

So, luckily he does not have access to her texts. 

Instead, I have led him to an old dusty relic that sits in my bedroom- a home phone! 

Last night Vitaly and his “girlfriend” spent over an hour on this phone.  I would have loved to know what they discussed especially since his social skills are not as developed as others his age.  Anyway, after an hour it was his bedtime.  They took another five minutes to get off the phone, going back and forth about who is hanging up. 

I see much more tween fun to come…!

neglect

Wow talk about neglectful!  I almost forgot I had a blog!  Luckily I remembered my password.   I was sitting thinking of my daughter's blog as it is the anniversary of her "gotcha day" or in adoption wordspeak the day she was announced by the court as OURS!.  Sadly, her blog disappeared into cyberspace one day, and I have not been able to retrieve it.  Two days we were walking and she had so many questions about being adopted and I told her that her gotcha day was today and she was ecstatic.  (at least I think it is today so that is the day I will be using).  Darn I wish I could get her blog back.  She has all of the questions, but frankly many of the answers and memories are locked away in that site.  Six years recall is not easy especially when you did this journey three times.  Everything begins to get muddled.  I told her some of her story.  She found it fascinating.  Wish I had the pictures I put on the sight as well but stupid me stuck them on there thinking that I would retrieve them (I downloaded my camera to the blog while in Ukraine for space).  Nope.  Cannot be located.

Anyway a quick gotcha day shout out to my special little ukie princess with the long blonde hair and eyes the color of blue and grey that sparkle with wonder and delight!

How to become a Family

Glancing at the calendar, I notice that it is 11 years ago that we had traveled to Ukraine.

It almost seems a lifetime ago, but in reality it was not.   I still have memories of our lives before we adopted a child.  We were together for almost 15 years, before we began a family.  We had met very young and married young, especially in relation to most of our friends and family.  We spent years working different schedules so I spent many hours alone, doing whatever I wanted, without much responsibility except to work, keep up the house and bills, and take care of our dogs.  We traveled extensively, and did not worry about getting a sitter, on a Friday or Saturday night.  Date nights were any and every night we wanted.  No worries or commitments to anyone except the two of us.

Then on a cold, November day, in 2000, in Ternopil Ukraine, we started a family. 

Definitely, not the traditional way, as our delivery date was after a long noisy train ride wearing the same dirty clothes, and after playing cards and drinking a few beers, the night before. 

We met Vitaly a sad, scared, starving baby who weighed 11 pounds and was 15 months old.  We were just as scared of becoming a parent, as he was of becoming a son.  How does one prepare to go from 15 years childless to suddenly a parent? 

The memory that remains most vivid was when we finally were able to leave the orphanage with him permanently.  As we crowded into an old taxi, with our new son in hand, my husband looked at him and me and kissed us both.  A sudden feeling of completion and true love.  The two of us were now a family, of three.   

update to last post

Just an update to my last post about V and his love letter.  Of course, as his mother I do have to be cautious so I asked his teacher if the young lady was in his class, I did NOT say anything about the note.

Which is why I was completely shocked when he says (in a not so happy tone), "Mom why did you ask my teacher about Jillian.  Geez, why did you do that?" 

Lots of things went through my mind like:

Why did the teacher tell him?
I didnt say anything about the note...
Is he embarassed?
Is he in trouble?
Will he ever trust me again..

I did apologize and said it wasn't bad, what I asked I just wanted to make sure you were okay!

He turned to the window and sulked.

I felt kinda stupid then.  Maybe, there is a time that even as the mother of a special needs child, I need to just back off and let it all play out.  Then, again, the world is a cruel place.

Pre-teenisms

I got the first glimpse of Middle School hormone angst today.

A note addressed to Vitaly from a girl.

Alarms went right off.   I am always worried about him being bullied.  He is in the Special Needs classroom so it might be very funny to some pre-teen girls to pick on him.  What an easy way to prank him but to write a note and have him think someone "likes" him.

The note went something (remotely) like this:

To Vitaly
From (name)

Do you think I am beautiful or pretty?
If you are going to be my boyfriend are you going to hold my hand?
I hope you think I am pretty and not fat if you think I am fat then that would make me sad.
Write me.
name

Alarms!!!  Really does my autistic spectrum/PDD/FAE child even understand what it means to "like" someone in such a way?  Sure he knows what a girlfriend is but he doesn't know what a "girlfriend" really means.  Two completely different things to him.

So I had a mini meeting with dad.  He read it.  Seemed a bit concerned.

We asked Vitaly about it and he got very embarassed as he grabbed the note and ran (and then hid the note)

Yes, he said he did write her back and told her, "Football is number one and Go Packers!" I guess that is a twelve year old boy for you. 

Not sure if I am ready for this pre-teen world!

Uh-oh!

Uh-oh!
Oh No!
Crash!
It's broken!
Look what happened!
Stormy! (aka the bad dog)

Don't you just love when you hear those.  Too me it means one thing.  Something will need to be replaced.  Perhaps it is junk (cross fingers) or something valuable (*@%>).  Either way it seems to be a constante lately in our home. 
I think I just about had enough when I was in the bedroom and I heard the sound of breaking glass on floor.  That is never a good one!  Then I heard the sound of little feet up the stairs and "mommy don't be mad at daddy."  Great.  What can that mean?  Must be something I have treasured and bought to enjoy.

Then from the bedroom I hear the sound of glass going into a trashcan.  As I am told, "he didn't mean to break your plate!"

Now it hits me.  Must be one of the plates of a collection of FOUR (not a collection of one but a collection of FOUR) on the kitchen wall that I have enjoyed pre-mommyhood bought for my enjoyment!! MINE!!!!!

Sadly, it is one of the the four.  So now I have THREE.  Doesn't quite look right.  Missing one like missing a tire on a bike.  The sulking begins (but I will stalk EBAY)

Next day...

From the bedroom.

Loudly stated from husband "Stupid Psycho Dog~!"

Uh. Oh.
Can't be good.  We have already seen our living room carpet  that she has decided need her claws to dig at while we are away. 

I go upstairs.  I see a large hole.  I see what is actually under the carpet and foam!  I see alot of it in fact.  I turn to the left, I see carpet remains and bits of foam.
Really?  What was she thinking?  I know what I was thinking.  This is a mess.  We will have to get new carpet but how can we because she is still psycho and still lives with us.

Then I hear, mom- Vitaly is in the paint!  The craziness continues..

Seven Years

No, You can't do it I tell her...

But, Mommy you have to let me....

No, not if I can help, it I say. If I had it my way, you would all stay little....no more birthdays!

Oh, and remember Grandpa said there is no September on the calendar (I remind her).

She said "yes there is- see (pointing to the big day)!"

And just like that, my little girl turned seven.. and there is nothing I can do or say, to stop my little girl from growing into a beautiful young lady. Happy 7th Birthday Oksana.

(And even earned a little girl rite of passage - She got to get her ears pierced!)

Back in Action

Okay so I apologize for the neglect of my blog. Facebook has become a favorite and if anyone wants to friend me feel free just let me know you are a blog reader.

I will definitely be posting some new pictures as soon as I get my husband to download them.

The summer is beginning with a new sitter and a new start for the kids and I hope a regular daily upkeep of the blog.

Things we have learned the past few months:

Vitaly plays soccer a lot better with his glasses on (they always made him take them off) so contacts will be on order for football season!
Nikolai can eat two Frisch's big boys for dinner (he was very happy with this accomplishment-!)
Oksana is a budding artist- which right there says she is not any genetic relation to me- as I cannot draw or paint.
Job change is not always a pleasant experience but if it pays the bills then I will move forward.
Dogs can destroy your carpet in one afternoon at home alone.
A child can go destroy three bikes in three months.
Nikolai is a pretty decent little leaguer!
If you leave the water running in the bathtub and it overflows- it can come through the kitchen ceiling!
New applicances can update a kitchen in one day.
Weeds love my flowerbeds.
Hiking the same trails with my kids, that as a child I breezed through, is a lot harder as an adult.
Many more adventures are ahead....

In Memoriam

My best friend lost her son tragically on March 17th, 2011. It was one of those tragic accidents that are hard to even think about. He was struck and killed by numerous cars on a busy highway.

His name was David Vantrease. He will be forever 22 years old.

I remember the first few times I met David. He was six years old. RaeLynn and I worked together. She was a single mother. We spent so many hours at her house watching him entertain us. One of my favorite memories was when he wanted to be "Major Payne" and got his hair shaved as such. I remember him sneaking out of the house and sneaking back in while his mom was looking for him and him asking me not to tell he left. He was a friend to so many.

He was so adored by his mom and his sister (although she considered him a pesky little brother).

He moved away later in his life to live with his father but we still got to see him during many occassions.

He loved my kids and my kids adored him, especially the boys. His step sister Erin got married in November. David was just a big kid at heart and hung out and danced with Nikolai and Oksana.

His smile was contagious.

We will miss you terribly David and grieve of the years we will spend without your smile walking into a room.

Life with boys...lesson #1

Nice family dinner.

Nik estatic and smiling has something to say...

Guess what I can do now?

Family- What?

Nik- Armpit farts- listen!!! (He proceeds to raise his shirt, and make noise from his armpit)

I guess I have to always encourage so I say- Good job! Oksana joins in- Wow Nik! Vitaly always supportive states- Who cares! Dad- muffled sound maybe in awe of son's accomplishment but cannot decipher.

Nik smiling from ear to ear proceeds to continue in a songlike trance.

He stops and says well I can't do the knee airfart yet like Vitaly.

I guess that means he will be practicing to achieve these feat of greatness.

Another milestone in boyhood achieved!

Hitting Puberty

Puberty
The word itself it just scary/awful/hard to say, etc...
I personally remember sitting in fouth and fifth grade "girls only" gymnasium talk with a film describing the "whole" thing, but in a cartoon form. As if any of us are animated figures. I remember one young lady named V actually lifted her hand and told everyone she had already had the "period!" We all were in awe of her, but then again she also had a bra. Something, I personally begged my mom for although I didnt quite need- just so I had the bra strap under my tshirt.

Now Vitaly is entering the big P! He is eleven. He is wearing a size 11 men's shoe. Larry has borrowed his boots this winter to do some shoveling. He no longer fits in any pants that were purchased pre-fifth grade in the fall. They are considered floods. He has a weird Peter Brady sort of voice that goes from a screechy kid to a deeper sound that is a bit scary.

He has a thing lately for my magazines. He especially is fond of the JCPenney lingerie sections.
He talks about a young lady in his class as "hot". He is growing hair and as Nikolai states not on his head! He also is learning about Oxy Clean pads and deodorant and washing your hair regularly.

We had a stop at the Physician's office the other day. He is in the 95% for height. That is quite tall for an eleven year old, at this rate he will easily surpass 6 feet and this is a kid that missed out with nutrition his first 15 months of his life. He has made up for that now, because he can eat, and eat, and eat. Doesnt matter what good things or bad they are all consumed at an alarming rate that would cause any normal adult to gain weight and go on a diet. Not with him. He has almost zero body fat.

The one thing I cannot imagine is my baby with a mustache and a beard! Really? He will soon have to shave!!!

Oh the joys of puberty.

The Bachelor

Oksana was sleeping in the bed with me last night as I flipped through the TV stations. I stopped at "the Bachelor", which is a bad train wreck, but you just have to stop. The girls were all greeting the guy dolled up in formal wear, when I hear, mommy did you see that blue dress! I look over and she is awake and watching the TV. Then she commented as each girl got out of the limo and started to ask lots of questions:

"Is he a Prince?"
"Are they going to get married?"
"Why do they all keep thanking him?"

I sort of explained the premise and told her to go back to sleep, but she was like I want to see it and she was so excited!

I thought this episode is probably pretty tame, so why not.

When he gave the rose to the first girl, she turned to me and said, "So daddy gave you a rose too and that is how you got married?"

Well, not exactly, I told her.

Then as he gave all the roses out she said, "He is going to marry a lot of girls! He will need lots of money!"

Vitaly's Story Part IV

Day Twenty: "Birth Certificate"-10:00a.m.-HotelWe get up sort of late. I am tired, because I have not been sleeping well. The mattress is very old and thin. Everytime, I lay down I disappear into the hole it makes. We go to the internet cafe. We are trying to contact Swiss Air about changing our reservations. Our flight is supposed to depart tommorow from Warsaw. I am totally stressed over getting the reservation changed. Swiss Air has not responded to our emergency email so we had back to the hotel to wait for Masha.1:00 p.m.- TernopilMasha comes to get us in our room. She wants us the hurry and talk to the head of Vital Statistics. We run to the building, but the lady refuses to see us because she is hungry and going to lunch. She tells us to go away, until after lunch. So, we go to the first restaurant we ate in, when we arrived in Ternopil. I order the sausage stuffed with spaghetti, only because it comes with ketchup. I really miss my condiments and spicy hot foods I crave. The one thing we notice is all the restaurants have similar menus. There is mostly soup, pizza, pork, dumplings and potatoes. Masha comments the lady at Vital Stats seems very mean.
2:00 p.m.- Vital Stats officeWe go back to the Vital Stats office. Masha talks for awhile and then we have our new birth certificate. She is not so mean afterall. Meanwhile, Larry and I cannot figure out how to change our airline rez. We decide to call our travel agent- Janice- even with the time difference. She is there! In one minute, she is able to reschedule our flight for one week later. Masha is amazed by our technology. She says Ukraine needs more computers, so there would be less running around. We all laugh.5:00 p.m.- Passport OfficeThe passport office says it will take five days at least to get a passport. No way around the time of wait. Masha talks to some other ladies, they say they will have it by the morning. So, we run to the notary to finish the paperwork.7a:00 p.m.- DinnerIt is our last night in Ternopil. We want to go to the Europa, but it is extremely crowded. So, we go back to the Mermaid. We go to bed early, because we know tommorow will be a long day.

Day Twenty- One: "Gotcha Day" 9:00a.m.- DowntownI am searching for some paintings of the town. I cannot decide and think I will return later to buy one. We never do buy the painting. We do get some other souvenirs luckily. We meet Masha and she is estatic. She has the passport!11:15 a.m.-OrphanageWe go to the orphanage to get our son. We are very excited. We meet another American couple adopting twins. The first Americans we have seen here, but a day late. We take the caregivers a cake and say good-bye. Suddenly, just like that, Vitaly is going home with us!noon- HotelWe go back to the hotel to get our luggage. We think we are getting a rental van, but instead it is an Opel Omega. We cannot possibly fit all of our luggage, 4 adults, and an infant in this little car. Larry and I sit smashed with Vitaly on our lap. The car rides turns out to be miserable. Vitaly is doing great though. Once again, we almost get into a car wreck. They really do need car seats. I remind Vitaly, as a baby i too traveled across Europe, without a carseat.5:30p.m.- KyivWe are lost in Kyiv. Our driver cannot find the Tourist Hotel. We have to wait for a taxit to pick us up, and transfer everything. We are going to stay in a flat with a lady named Olga. Vitaly is beginning to run a fever and is coughing. I am worried about getting him fed and cleaned.6:30p.m.- Olga's apartmentOlga has helped many other families. As soon as we arrive, she takes Vitaly. Before I know it, she has fed him two bowls of cereal and milk. She finishes with a bottle, bathes him, and puts him to bed. What a relief! She wants to feed us too, but we choose to grab a quick bite at McDonalds. We both take a long hot bath and I get to shave for the first time in two weeks. I go to bed, but I worry about Vitaly so I watch him sleep.

Day Twenty-two: Saturday Dec 9th- Kyiv7:00 am- Olga's apartmentVitaly is definitely following his regular schedule! Larry and I get up and we decide it is bathtime. He does not like it- but he smells much better. Besides, being very thin overall he looks quite healthy. Vitaly has a cold and cough now. So, we give him some juice with some medicine in it. Vital's breakfast is a huge bowl of mashed potatoes, then a bottle of milk. Both are fed to him by Olga, who has returned to feed us. We are served our breakfast, which is fried potatoes, cheese, hot dogs, and beets. Way too much food for us to eat. Vitaly is served one hot dog too.Noon- KyivMasha and her husband Vlad meet us for a day of sightseeing. Olga is watching Vitaly for us since he is sick. We go to the "Mother of our Mother" statue and WWII museum. Both are extremely fascinating. We decide to have a snack at a tourist stop restaurant across the street. It is way too expensive and not worth it.4:30 p.m.- Olga'sWe meet Olga's neighbor- Freida and her granddaughter. They are missionaries from Tennessee. They play with Vitaly who thinks it is very funny and we hear him laugh for the first time. We also see him crawl. This is a totally different baby then we have seen yet. He also has eaten ALOT by Olga.8:00 p.m.-bedtimeVitaly finally goes to bed. he has had a huge first day away from the orphanage. Larry and I are very grateful for Olga's help.

Day Twenty- three and four: KyivWe spend the next two days shopping, getting the medical exam, and also saying good-bye to Masha. She has a wedding to attend in her hometown for her Mother- In- Law. We sadly say good-bye. We will miss her very very much!!!Day Tweny- Five: KyivWe have a new translator named Igor. We do more shopping and eating. We spend the evening packing and get ready to leave. We will be departing for Warsaw in the afternoon.Day Twenty- Six: KyivWe say good-bye to Olga and leave for the American Consulate. Another family we met earlier in the week is traveling with us. They are Robyn, Bill and their new beautiful daughter Elizabeth. We go to the consulate and then head for the airport. Unfortunately, the only flight we can get is 615$ for the three of us and we must go to Budaphest first. Oh well, it is our only option this late in the day. Vitaly does great on the plane. I wish I could see Budaphest, but it is dark. 9:30 p.m.- Warsaw SheratonWe are at the Sheraton. It is spectactular!!! We lounge for awhile with Robyn and Bill, then I go to the room. I take a VERY long bubble bath, and really wash my hair well. They have big white terry-cloth robes, which I love. I send some of our clothes to be laundered for the trip home. It is a bit pricey, but worth it.

Day Twenty-Seven: "Embassy Day" 9:30a.m.- WarsawWe walk to the American Embassy for our appointment. We are glad we brought the stroller now. When we get to the entrance, we get to pass by the huge line of people waiting to get it since we are Americans. It takes @ two hours to process our paperwork. There are other Cathy Harris couples there and we all talk.Noon- WarsawWe go back to the Sheraton. It is time for Vitaly to take a nap. I watch TV and Larry goes to meet Bill downstairs. We plan to meet for lunch at 2:00p.m.2:00p.m.- SheratonWow- what a treat, we are eating Tex Mex type food. I am so happy to be eating spicy nachos for the first time in weeks. YUM...3:00p.m.- EmbassyBack to the Embassy to pick up the visa. We get it and then decide we will go to OldTown with Bill. We head to OldTown Warsaw. What a beautiful place. It is December 14th, so everything is decorated for Christmas. We spend time walking, shopping and eating before heading back to the Sheraton. It is a wonderful city.8:00p.m.- SheratonRobyn and Elizabeth join us for some food and drinks. We are leaving tommorow morning very early (4:30a.m.). We take some pictures and pack then get some rest.Day Twenty- Eight: "HOMEWARD BOUND"- Warsaw4:30 a.m.- SheratonWe are getting up at 4:30, it seems like we never even slept. We try not to awaken Vitaly and carry him to the taxi. Too late, he awakens when the cold air hits him. 7:00 a.m.- AirportWe are departing Warsaw on a beautiful SwissAir plane heading to Zurich. Vitaly is being very good and hams it up. We are thrilled.9:30 a.m.- ZurichI am changing a second messy diaper. Luckily the Zurich airport has a terrific family area for the children to play and parents to relax. It is wonderful and really helps. We finally get to the counter to get our seats. We are worried because the flight is "sold out", and we were not reassigned any seats. At first, the counter tells us no seats together. We are devastated. Then suddenly, she says she has found three. Well, three becomes four when noone sits in the other. What a bonus- sold out flight and we even have the only spare empty too! Our flight is 10 hours long.3:00- ChicagoWe are back in the US and they are playing Christmas music. It is sort of odd because we almost forgot it was close to Christmas. We are thrilled to be back in the states. We even remember today is our TEN year wedding anniversary! Our flight to Dayton has been cancelled due to ice in Chicago. We are desperate to get home and plead to every airline. Finally, we are successful and depart Chicago.12:00 a.m.- Dayton, OhioWe are home! Aunt Sally, Christy, Cathy, Rowland, Judy, Hunter and Joe S are all still waiting for us. Amazing- and we never expected anyone! We are thrilled beyond belief. We get home and go directly to bed after giving the dogs a huge hug.We are so happy to be home and with our new son!

Vitaly's Story Part III

Day Twelve: "Our Suitcases Return" 9:00a.m.-orphnageWe get up early to go to the orphanage. Vitaly does not cry this time, when he sees us. Grumpy- yes, but upset- no. I think he might begin to like us. 5:00p.m.- TernopilDima has joined us again. He has all of our suitcases, because they would not fit on the plane. We have had the same two outfits for five days. Some clean clothes and undergarments. I am so excited. I want to burn the clothes I have worn for the past five days. I do throw them away before we leave. We have dinner together and then play a card game called Fool.

Day Thirteen: "Scotch" noon-TernopilWe are in the hotel with Masha and Dima. Masha tells us that Dima needs some scotch. So, we say okay. So, we say does he need money to get his scotch? She say no, use the scotch in your room. Larry and I are confused. We do not have any alcohol in the room. So, we say he can go buy some. She says no get your scotch tape in your room. We laugh because we have duct tape, but no scotch tape. We are thinking she meant a drink.4:00p.m.-orphanageWe go to the orphanage to see V. We give him some more juice. He lets us hold him, but becomes very upset when his favorite caregiver walks by. Her name is Maria. She loves Vitaly very much and has raised him, since a baby. The second she holds him, he begins to smile and laugh. She tells us wonderful things about Vitaly. She is very happy , because Vitaly is going to America.7:00p.m.- TernopilWe go to dinner with Masha and Dima. We go to the most expensive restaurant in the town. We have decided to treat them to a nice dinner. I have chicken stuffed with mushrooms and mushroom "soap" (as the menu reads). Dima can eat and drink a lot and our bill is over 200 gryvnas!

Day Fourteen: "Dinner Treat" 4:00p.m.- orphanageWe go to the orphanage. Vitaly is in a great mood. They say because his belly is full. Today, they were given cabbage soup. He lets us play with him and he laughs. He is very cute and we are so happy.6:30p.m.- TernopilWe meet Dima for dinner. He wants to treat us this time. He really liked the expensive restaurant from last night, so we return. There are more people tonight including two very old men dancing with two very young women. There is a piano player and we have a lot of fun. Dima insists we eat dessert, so we split a huge ice cream sundae. He also gives us some bad news. They say we must wait 10 days after a court date for the vital statistics to be ready. Also, our paperwork will not be ready until Monday. This is upsetting, but not much we can do.

Day Fifteen: "Outdoor Market" 8:00a.m.- TernopilI get up earlier then everyone. I hate the bed. It is very old and caves in. I am glad Larry has brought a Gameboy, which I play for hours. We meet Masha and go to the outdoor market. I love it, but there are so many people. An old woman runs over my feet with a cart. Masha laughs and tells me the lady said I move like an elephant. We purchase a cute snowsuit for Vitaly. We also get some toothpaste, deodarant and a radio for the orphanage. We buy some children's tapes to play in the room.4:00p.m.-orphanageTime to see Vitaly. We cannot go earlier in the day, because the babies must sleep for four hours in the afternoon. Masha begins to call our days- "Groundhog Day". It is true, everyday seems to be just like the last. Vitaly is cranky and very hungry. We give him a bottle of juice. He likes Larry to hold him, but I think it is because he is tall. The hall we stand in has nothing for Vitaly to play with. We want to interact more, but they won't let us in with the other children. He sees Maria and screams. It is dinnertime for him, so we leave.7:30p.m.- TernopilWe head back to our favorite restaurant. It has great pizza and MTV. We head back to the hotel. Masha has a TV in her room. We play fool and watch a chessy American movie. Of course, it is dubbed, so we make up the words. Masha insists the start is a guy called Billy Zane. Larry says 'Nyet. So, they argue and laugh about it all night.

Day Sixteen: "Masha hat"- noon downtownWe go to the internet cafe. We are going to download a picture of Vitaly to send to everyone. We are all so excited for something to do. Masha goes shopping. It takes over one hour to download one picture.4:00 p.m.- OrphanageWe are going to the orphanage. Our cab drivers are getting greedy. They are like sharks swarming our hotel, when they know we will need a ride. When, we first got to Ternopil, cabs cost about 6 gryvnas one way. Now, they are charging 9 gryvnas. We think they have been talking amongst each other. When we see Vitaly, he seems very grumpy. We give him some juice, which helps to calm him. He is definitely very hungry. Masha plays with the Gameboy, while we play in the dark hall with Vitaly. We really wish we could use the nursery. Vitaly really seems to like Larry. He likes to look at everything. We take a picture of him in the Masha hat. ( It is a really cool different colored hat she wears.) Of course, we think this is really funny!
7:00 p.m.- Europa CafeOops, here we are again at the Europa Cafe. Nothing else to do but eat. We really like the Europa. They have traditional american style pizzas, and play American music. Whenever, we go in they will find us a seat- even if it is reserved. It is always crowded. We stop at the milk store on the way back to the hotel to get some drinks for the morning. We are tired and decide to go to bed early. Larry finishes his book and I play on the Gameboy.

Day Seventeen: "The Judge"- 9:00 a.m. HotelI awake early again. I am glad we have brought the Gameboy now for entertainment. We get ready to go meet Masha. Wait- no hot water- so no shower for me!11:00 a.m.- NotaryWe meet Masha and go to a new department of state office. We are notarizing documents, we have previously notarized. We wait two hours. Then they say it will be a LONG wait. At least, a couple of days for them to notarize. So we leave.1:00 p.m.- officeWe meet the Inspector Lady, who wants us to meet her boss for the final document she has collected. She is very happy and excited for us. Her boss is dressed in a very nice suit and looks great. We, on the other hand, are looking very shabby. Imagine, everyday we have tried to look presentable just in case, but the day we don't care BINGO. He asks us many questions like why Ukraine, why Vitaly, etc.. Suddenly, everyone is congratulating us and shaking hands. We have the signed paper needed for the NAC!1:30 p.m.- DowntownTime to notarize the NAC paper. We run to the first notary-not there. We run to the second notary- refuse to do it. We run across town to the third notary- too busy. We pant back to the first notary- jackpot! He says he can do it, but to come back later. This is bad, because we have an appointment to meet the court judge at three.4:00 p.m.- CourthouseTo the notary's office to pick up the papers. We then go to see the Judge, but he is not there. A lady Judge talks with Masha and says he will be back soon. We wait, the building closes at six. It is now 6:10 p.m. We are pacing back and forth. Suddenly, the Judge arrives with his friends. He refuses to speak with us. The lady Judge asks him if she can do the case. He couldn't care one way or the other. So, she takes the case and reviews it. She sets our court date for Wednesday- Yippee!! Could we be leaving for Kyiv by Saturday????7:00 p.m.- DinnerWe decide to try a new restaurant to celebrate the court date. It is called the Mermaid. The waitress is very friendly. The food is not very good, but the prices are. Our total bill is28 gryvnas for food and drinks. We decide to drink some vodka to celebrate. I ask for a bloody mary. Well, unlike American drinks, the liquor and juice are not mixed. So, you first shoot the vodka on top, then drink the juice underneath. We rename the drink a bloody Masha. We of course think it is very funny! Now, we have stayed to long at the restaurant. We are racing to meet the train to Kyiv by 8:45 p.m. We barely get to the train, with our papers for the NAC, before it departs.

Day Eighteen: "Groundhog Day"- 10:00 a.m.- HotelWe have nothing to do but sit and wait. Groundhog day as we have dubbed them. Masha has lots of work, it will be a long day for her. She is revisiting the Judge. Larry and I sit and wait in the room. We eat some snacks, we have brought. I am tired and feeling a bit cranky. I am catching a wicked cold. I go back to sleep.4:00 p.m.- OrphanageThis is the day we will give the donations to the orphanage. We meet with the Director. I have brought many clothes, shoes, blankets, meds and toys from the US. When, I give them, noone seems to care. We have lugged the bags all around Ukraine, and yet, noone really cares about the clothes. We have put a monetary donation in an envelope also. The Director and Masha are talking. While, I am sifting through the donations, I look up and everyone is looking at me. So, I smile. Masha asks "donation?" So, I am confused and say "not enough?" She looks confused and says, "where is it?" I laugh and point to the envelope they have missed. The Director now sees it too and laughs. Now, time to go see Vitaly. I have a cold, so I cannot interact very much. I try, but I am scared of making him sick. Larry does a great job though. He gives him a bottle of juice. I cannot believe it, but Vitaly cannot drink it all. And, yes he is full! So, I wonder if we are feeding him correctly. We are still new at this. Masha laughs and says yes. Vitaly wants to cuddle and I cannot believe how terrific he looks in Larry's arms. They are meant to be father and son. You can tell Larry will be a great dad and Vitaly adores him.8:00 p.m.- DinnerWe are trying a new dinner location. We like it very much. It is very quaint and good. I have dumplings, potatoes, and tea. Larry has schnitzel, potatoes and a coke.

Day Nineteen: "ADOPTION DAY"- DECEMBER 6th, 2000.
10:00 a.m.- TernopilSo, here we are. The day we have waited for the entire trip. It is the court date. We get up and go to buy some gifts for the Judge and her Secretary. We buy some office supplies for the Secretary. We also give her some cosmetics and paper. She is very pleased by the gifts. We decide to buy some beautiful yellow roses for the Judge. We stop to get a bite to eat to ease our stomachs. We have a small pizza and a coke.Noon- CourtWe pick up the Inspector. We go to the courthouse. We are expecting a big cold chamber for our hearing. Instead, the chamber is an office with seven chairs. The Inspector reads a magazine, while the Prosecutor (also a woman) looks very bored. The Judge comes in and the hearing goes something like this. (Stand up one at a time). Leanna or Larry what do you do/where do you live/will you take care of the child/will you want him? All are very basic questions. We ask them to waive the ten days, because he is delayed and we have airline tickets. They tell us to leave the chamber for ten minutes. The Inspector comes out and gives us her congratulations. Masha says it is a good sign. The Judge has us come back in the office. She has waived the ten days- YEAH! We are now his parents. We show her pictures of our home and dogs. She is very nice, but stresses the vital statistics office may not waive the ten day period. She says they are very hard.4:00p.m. - OrphanageWe are going to pick up Vitaly for his passport picture. He looks so cute in the outfit Maria puts him in. At first he smiles, when he sees Larry (papa), but it doesnt last long and he begins to cry. Since, I am still sick, I will not hold him. Larry carries him to the taxi. WOW- he loves it! He is very attentive and interested in the workd outside. He does not cry at all. Larry holds him close and he looks out the window. What a relief- we thought it might be more traumatic. We go to a photo shop. The photographer is not the best. We remind him it is only for a passport. The photos are very silly. We return Vitaly to the orphanage and go to dinner.

To be continued...

Vitaly's Story part II

Day Six: "Thanksgiving" 11:30 a.m.-Taxi to MaripolIfeel today will be a good day. I know we will find our son today. We have departed in a taxi, which must be 30 years old. Larry and I are laughing, because it has to be the oldest one around. It has snowed overnight and the roads are very bad. We almost get in a accident. We hit ice and the car has spun out of control, crossing to the other side of the road. Now, I am frightened. We are very lucky the semi that just passed was five seconds behind. Masha even looks scared.3:30 p.m.-MaripolWe are at the orphanage. Dima is waiting. The director seems very nice and the orphanage is immaculate. She takes us into her office and starts arguing with Dima. Masha looks worried. I ask her what is wrong. She says "We will be shown two boys ages 5 and 3.5" I am stunned. I wonder why we are not being shown the babies? She says this is the older orphanage. Larry and I feel completely hopeless, when in walks a beautiful and happy five year old boy (Dima). Larry takes out a toy we have brought.and plays with him. Everyone is watching. I do not know what I feel. He is a great kid, but he is five. The 3.5 year old comes in and he has Down's. He is crying, so they let him leave. Then in walks a terrific dimpled five year old (Sasha). He is very sweet and cute. I still feel they are too old. I have been dreaming of a baby and planned for one. We do not know what to do. We know we might leave Ukraine without a child. After much deliberation and heartache, I decide I do not feel the connection to adopt a five year old. (Sasha was later adopted by another IUAFN family - YEAH). We hug the boys, thank the Director and leave. When I get into the taxi, I lose it completely. I am so mad and confused! I feel betrayed, since I did not see any younger children, and thought I was going to. Larry is upset too. It is not Dima or Masha's fault, it is just circumstance. They are working very hard. I ask to find a phone. I call Cathy Harris and she tells me to return to Kyiv and the AC in the morning. She is terrific and I feel much better.

Day Seven: "Back to Kyiv" 4:00 a.m.-MaripolWe awake at 4:00a.m. It is extremely cold. We take a taxi (without heat) to the Donetsk airport one hour away. It costs $40. Our flight to Kyiv is ($265) is surreal. The plane is very old and reminds you of an old fifties movie. There is lots of ice on the runway and the plane. I am scared to death.10:30 a.m.- KyivWe arrive back at the NAC for our next appointment. We wait for two hours in the hall, before Tatiyana calls us in. We begin to look through many pictures. We pick out of many boys, but whenever Tatiyana calls they are already adopted. We go to lunch, and return to look at more pics. We cannot make up our mind.4:30 p.m.- NACIt is time for the NAC to close. Since it is a Friday, we are beginning to feel desperate. We have quite a few pictures and are debating the diagnosis. Someone hands a new picture to Masha. It is a newborn picture of a 15 month old boy. His diagnosis looks very good. We know right away. This is our son. His name is Vitaly. He is in a difficult region called Ternopil, but we do not care.7:00p.m.-KyivWe hitch a ride with the local soccer trainer. We think Masha says circus trainer, so it is very funny. His daughter is in the car. She is about six and will not look at us. Wegive her two lollipops. Her dad is quite the talker! We go to a very nice hotel. It has a brand new bathtub, three beds, and a kitchen. Larry has meat dumplings, while I eat potato dumplings. We sleep great and dream of our son.

Day Eight: "Saturday" 10:00 a.m.- KyivWe get up early and go to the train station for tickets to Ternopil. We think we are going on the 2 p.m. train, but find out there is a fast train leavining at 10 p.m. Perfect. Now, we have a whole day in Kyiv. We tour the monastary, caves, and shop. We go to an internet cafe and have dinner. Masha is very funny and great to hang around.10:00 p.m.- Train StationWe board the train for Ternopil. We are in second class theis time and are swarmed by school children. They are very interested to speak English to us.. Some of the boys are talking slang.. They ask Larry "Yo Man, Waz Up?" Masha Stays in our cabin. The bathrooms on this train are very bad.

Day Nine: "We meet Vitaly" 7:00 a.m.- TernopilWe are in Ternopil. We take a taxi to the orphanage right off the train. The orphanage workers say we must wait for the doctor. We wait two hours.9:30 a.m.- orphanageAfter a quick meeting with the doctor about Vitaly's health (very good), we are finally allowed to meet him. She asks if we want to see "All the available children?" We decline. I am so excited. When they bring him out, he begins to cry. We are strangers. We laugh (because he is so cute) and hold him. He is mine!!! I know right away. We hold him and play. He is still very upset, and has huge crocodile tears running down his face. I am very happy and kiss him. We are led to another office in the orphanage. We are shown pictures of other adopted children. The director is very nice and loves kids.Noon- TernopilWe go to the hotel. It is very expensive ($35). Our room has twin beds, little heat, and a dirty bathroom. Hot water is three times a week and twice a day. I miss it everytime! Masha, Larry and I walk the town. we find a internet cafe and a great restaurant. We go to bed early. I dream of my new baby boy.

Day Ten: "The Cookie" 1:00p.m.-TernopilWe meet Masha for lunch. We have pizza and european salad. It is very good. All the food has been pretty good so far. We go shopping and walk around the town. It is very European and quaint. We really like it.5:00p.m.We go to the orphanage to visit Vitaly. He is still upset, but lets up hold and talk to him. We have brought him some cookies. He is standing in a wooden playpen. A caregiver breaks off a piece of cookie and gives it to him. He cannot swallow solids very well, so she is hitting the back of his neck. I do not like this. Vitaly gets so excited by the cookie, he lets go of the rail and falls backward. He cannot stand on his own yet. I gasp and she picks him up. She gives him some more cookie and he lets go again. I say no more cookie! I cannot stand to see him fall. We take more pics and say good-bye.

Day Eleven: "The Walker" 1:00p.m.- TernopilLarry and I have spent the morning walking the town and shopping. We meet Masha for lunch. We have to go to the education department and meet with the inspector. He is very nice and asks why we want to adopt and other general questions. 3:30- orphanageWe see Vitaly in his play groupa. There are eleven other babies. We have brought him some juice. They stick him in an old walker. He can barely move. He will not come towards us, and backs quickly away towards his caregivers. We give him the juice and can tell he is very hungry. I wish we could bring him with us.

To be continued....

Vitaly's Story- Ten years

It seems a bit unreal that it has been ten years since we first traveled to Ukraine and adopted our first son.

We had done a "webpage" back then to capture Vitaly's journey. Interesting enough the sight later shut done because the new craze became a blog!

So, in honor of our first adoption I have decided to cut and paste his story here, as a little reminder of the journey to our first cabbage patch kid! (but I will do it a few days at a time..)

OUR ADOPTION STORY
Day One: "Plane Day" 11:45 a.m. Dayton, Ohio- November 18th, 2000I cannot believe our time to travel to Ukraine has finally arrived. We have planned, worked on our paperwork, and rerouted our adoption for almost one year. It almost seems surreal to be leaving in a few minutes. Even with all the planning, I am still repacking and trying to get every detail just right. Total luggage count: Two large suitcases containing my clothes/essentials/gifts. Two large duffels bags which contain Larry's clothes/baby clothes/orphanage donations/blankets/pillows. One carry-on with a change of clothes and paperwork. Two backpacks with personal goods. We are also carrying moneybelts with a total of 10,000$ inside. Our last item to carry-on is an umbrella stroller. Larry hates it, but I know it will be a savior later on.4:30p.m.- Chicago, IllinoisWe are finally departing the USA and heading for Zurich, Switzerland. We are traveling on Swiss Airlines. It is a very nice plane, but the flight will take approximately nine hours. Luckily, another Cathy Harris family is on board. Carolyn Braden and her daughter Brittany. I cannot believe our luck, because we are only one row apart! We are able to talk and share our excitement.7:30p.m.- Chicago timeWe are due to arrive in Zurich, in less than six hours. I am so excited, I cannot sleep. Even though I know if I do not sleep now, who knows when I will. The anticipation is killing me!

Day Two: "Kyiv Day" 8:30a.m. Zurich, Switzerland- November 19th, 2000We are in the Zurich Airport. There is nothing to do, but wait for our 10:50a.m.flight to Kyiv. Larry, Carolyn, Brittany, and I are beginning to feel quite tired and cranky. One good thing is I have finally found a use for the umbrella stroller. It can double as a luggage carrier. What a relief for our aching backs.2:00p.m.- Kyiv AirportI cannot believe it. We have finally arrived in Ukraine. The day is very overcast and dreary. The airport is very old. We all enter into a large room. On one side is a booth to buy medical insurance, while another line is for passports/visas. There are many other Americans in line and we all introduce ourselves. After we have retrieved our tremendous amount of luggage, we head to the customs line. Customs asks for specific items to be declared- anything electronic, money, jewelry, or medicines. Larry and I both must fill one out, because we are both carrying these items. I list a radar detector, we have brought as a gift for our facilitator. It is the wrong thing to do. Not only does the customs official want to know if we have gifts, but to actually see this "radar" detector. I am thinking- yeah right- I have no idea where it is. Seven bags and I am suppossed to find a radar detector. So, as we open and dig, I come across a cheap radio headset I forgot about. The custom's official is watching me, so I proudly say "Oh, here it is." Larry looks at me disgusted and says, "No, it's a radio!" And, I sternly say, "Here it is- the radar detector." Larry agrees and the custom's officials look a bit confused and wave us through.6:00p.m.- Kyiv, UkraineWe really like our facilitator Dima and our translator Masha. Dima is a rather large guy in Ukrainian standards and is very young. Our translator is a beautiful young woman and very sweet. They will be our companions for the next few weeks. We travel to the Tourist Hotel and our room is not bad. Clean and comfortable. Dima and Masha say good-bye and tell us they will pick us up at 8:30a.m., to go to the Adoption Center (AC). Larry and I decide to get a bite to eat at an English Pub, inside of the hotel. Larry orders a grilled ham/cheese sandwich, which is the size of a slice of garlic toast. I get some onion soup and rice. The food is okay. We are in bed by 8:00p.m., and sleep until 6:00a.m.

Day Three: "Adoption Center" 6:00a.m.- KyivWe are feeling much better after a good sleep and a hot shower. I cannot believe today, we are going to the NAC. We dress in our better outfits and wait impatiently in the lobby. Dima and Masha finally pick us up and have great news- we are first in line. We wait for what seems like an eternity in a dark hall. There are about 25-30 other couples. It turns out we are second, but who cares, much better then last. We see Carolyn and many other IUAFN (Independent Ukrainian Adoption Family Network) families. 10:30a.m.- ACWe finally are called into Mrs. Kunko's office. She is the Director of the NAC.(National Adoption Center) She asks us, "why we are you here?" We have brought a picture of a family who have adopted twice and smile. She says there are no available children under three and none healthy. We nod and say we want a boy under three with minor correctable conditions. She sends us to another room, where a lady named Tatiyana is waiting. Tatiyana brings out a book with many older children or children with very serious problems. We politely shake our heads no and wait for more pictures. We are shown a book from the Lugansk region. There are three boys pictures and they seem to be healthy and around the age of two. Larry and agree we will go see them. I am relieved there is more than one child, available at the orphanage. We hope there might be others available too, because we really want a younger child. As we are leaving, we once again see Carolyn and the other families. They are still waiting their turn. We are so happy our facilitator is Dima.Noon- KyivWe buy our train tickets and now have the day to sightsee until our train departs. Kyiv has many beautiful churches and we see sights like St. Andrew's and St. Sophia's. Masha is a terrific guide.11:30p.m.- Train to LuganskI am so relieved this day is over. The Adoption Center is one of the most stressful and emotional things, we have done yet. We are now traveling 17 hours on a "first-class" sleeper train. We give some presents to Masha and Dima and try to sleep.

Day Four: "Train and Lugansk Day" 7:30a.m.-Train to LuganskSo far, this train ride has been okay. We have heard horror stories about the restrooms and overall conditions in general of the trains. But, personally, I have slept in worse places. Our compartment has two bench seats, which convert to beds, a table, and a TV. Of course, they only show American films dubbed in Russian. So, Larry and I read and sleep. Looking out the window is very interesting. The landscape and villages are a scene right out of an old soviet photo. There are very small villages with people leading goats and cows. Everyone seems very busy walking, riding bikes, or doing chores. The villages seem so remote, I wonder where they could be going. Most of the homes are very run-down, yet they paint them in vivid colors. It is fascinating.1:00p.m.- LuganskWe arrive in Lugansk. Dima meets us at the train station. He has driven over night in his Blazer. Our bags are so heavy, it takes three trips to unload them from the train. Dima says we will not be able to go to the orphanage today. We decide to check into the "best" hotel in the region. It has hot water and heat, unlike the one Masha stays in. We are lucky to meet another family in IUAFN- Rob, Sue, and Noah Corrigan. What a relief, I am so glad they are here with us. They are adopting a two year old boy and will be in court by Thursday.4:00p.m.-LuganskWe all meet at the Internet Cafe across the street from the hotel. Now, we have something to do when we are bored. It costs 4.5gryvnas for an hour (@5 gs=1$).We decide to go to a restaurant in town for dinner. We of course are the only Americans, but they have an English menu. So, we point to what we want, but the waitress cannot read English! I order some chicken with brown gravy, and mashed potatoes. Larry has chicken soup, Schnitzel and potatoes. The Corrigan's have a type of ravioli and pork. It is all good and we talk about the children we might see at the orphanage. They tell us of a cute red head boy with green eyes available for adoption. He is one of the pictures we were shown at the AC! It is cold, but we walk back to the hotel.

Day Five: "A Terrrible Day" 5:00a.m.-Lugansk HotelI am not able to sleep. My mind is racing in anticipation of going to the orphanage. I get up and rearrange the suitcases and look over some notes. Larry awakes around 8 and we go to breakfast in the hotel disco. We are served salami/cheese/slaw and bread. The butter slices looks like cheese (which I mistake them for) and I take a huge bite. Larry thinks this is hilarious. Next, we are served mashed potatoes with an egg and beets on top with sausage. Desert is wedding cake!Noon: LuganskWe are leaving for the orphanage in two cars. The Corrigan's are going to visit their new son Andy. We are going to FIND our son. Our translator Masha has to stay in Lugansk to fix some paperwork fot the Corrigan's. We are traveling with the Corrigan's translator- Yman. This does not make me happy. I want to be with Masha. It takes about 45 minutes to get to the orphanage, which is in the middle of nowhere. As we pull up, I see a group of children bundled up and outside. Larry and I smile. We are getting very anxious to see the children. We wait in a hall for about 30 minutes, and then, we are brought into a bleak office with a desk and two chairs. The head doctor comes in and barely glances at us. She seems very rude and asks Yman why we are there. She says there are no babies, only two years and older. We say okay, and she tells the nurse to bring in the first child. We know right away he is very sick and cannot stand. He is about three and when he sees us he screams and bangs his head on the wall repeatly. We are not prepared for this and don't know what to do. They say he has CP and many other conditions. We know he is not our son. We feel bad, but, we know they will often show the sickest children first. The next child is older then three. He cannot stand/walk. They say he also has CP. I am beginning to get worried and a bit upset. The doctor is glaring at us and Yman asks if we want to see him longer. We try to explain, we have come to see the children we were shown in the AC. We say we would like to see children with minor correctable conditions or less severe maladies. The doctor shakes her head and leaves the room. She tell Yman there are none available. Yman tells us there are two more boys, but they are very ill. This completely upsets me, and I break down and begin to cry. Then, Yman says "That is all, then" I am crying and ask "What about the three boys we saw at the AC?" He shrugs and states "This is all they have." I am a wreck. Larry and I run outside. The Corrigan's also run outside and cannot believe we have not been shown any of the AC children, including the red headed boy. Masha and Dima finally show up. He demands we go back into the orphanage to see another boy. The doctor says he is very ill. I want to leave the orphanage and say "Let's just go." But, they make me sit and I am crying. The doctor states "He is 2.5 and his mom drank a lot!" (Fetal Alcohol Syndrome) He is the size of a three month old and cannot even hold up his head. Everyone is looking at me and I tell Masha he is to ill and I want to leave. I am very upset for the children, and how I hate to turn them down, but I know they are not my son. We all leave the orphanage.

3:00 p.m.We are still sitting in a cold blazer. We are waiting to hear from the AC. We are also waiting for the Corrigan's to finish court. Dima answers the phone. There is alot of screaming. Masha is looking worried. I ask her "What has happened?" She says the AC wants us to go back to the orphanage. Thay think we have been shown the boys we saw in the pictures. I explain again, we were not shown them. I start to cry. About 45 minutes later the AC calls back. We are allowed to go to the baby house in Maripol. There should be three quite healthy baby boys under two. YEAH!6:00 p.m. LuganskThere are no trains to Maripol. So we hire a driver (50 dollars) for the three hour drive. We decide to leave in the a.m. We spend our last evening in Lugansk with the Corrigan's (who were successful in court) and Masha. Dima has gone ahead without us. We drink some good beer and eat undercooked chicken. We are asleep by ten. I am able to sleep for eight hours for the first time in a week. I dream of the boys we were shown in the orphanage.

To be continued tomorrow.....